Why Trans Identity Is Formed During Identity Crisis

Exploring the psychology of "egg cracking"

Most of the appeal of transgenderism for young people is that it answers the question “Who am I?” and lays out a series of actionable milestones that people can take concrete steps towards, giving a sense of structure and direction in a nihilistic and spirituality empty culture.

Often people with predisposing risk factors (AGP, autism, etc) find themselves “suddenly realizing” they’re trans in the depths of some kind of existential life crisis and the trans-gnosis serves as a kind of identity gestalt switch that rapidly realigns and reconstructs the autobiographical self-construct, creating a sudden epiphany that all their life problems will be solved if only they transition to the opposite sex.

However, this usually only creates a temporary sense of euphoria so long as progress is continuously made on these “milestones.” But eventually the reality of quotidian life hits and the fantasy fades but by this time they’re ideologically captured and victims of inertia and the sunk cost fallacy. Detransition is seen as “treasonous” to the movement.

Some, like myself, however, will eventually have another epiphany that brings the entire ideological edifice crashing down to reveal the deep truth which was there the entire time: we can never run away from the reality of our biological sex. Never!

Therefore, to understand the trans phenomenon, we must understand the spiritual and existential factors that undergird its psychological appeal.

It is important to understand that a good deal of trans identity is formed during a sudden epiphany or what’s known as your “egg cracking,” where you suddenly realize in a eureka moment that you are trans and that this is the secret decoder ring for understanding all the problems of your life.

This sudden cracking might be precipitated by years of tentative identity exploration (or fetishism and pornography, in the case of AGP). Still, it does seem quite common that the concrete decision to internally tell oneself, “Yes, I am transgender and yes I want to transition,” is not a gradual development but a sudden psychological flash of insight that completely reconfigures your autobiographical self-understanding.

This gestalt switch is important to understand because it identifies a key psychological precondition for trans identification: one usually must be in some existential crisis where you:

• Don’t know who you are or are struggling with your core existential identity

• Don’t know what to do next in your life

• Don’t know what your purpose in life is

• Don’t have any motivation towards concrete action

• Don’t have any major life goals you’re working towards

Often, this is associated with a kind of depressed state where one is drifting through life on autopilot or dealing with a lack of motivation. The trans identity gestalt switch and the new desire to transition suddenly provide answers to all these questions. This identity crisis is often precipitated by major events in someone’s life, such as a divorce or breakup, becoming a father, graduation, career stagnation, struggling with finances, aging or health concerns, or a global pandemic that created artificial conditions of loneliness and meaninglessness, etc.

Transgenderism tells you who you are, gives you a new community, a new political ideology and political liberation project, a concrete idea of “what to do next in life, " motivates you, and gives you hope that once you reach these milestones, you will finally achieve happiness. That anticipatory hope gives a sense of immediate euphoria that tricks you into thinking you are finally on the right path.

And in the cases of autogynephilic males, this entire process of rumination and idealization is associated with the euphoric escalation of a paraphilia, which is akin to pursuing the high of a drug addiction, which provides a positive impetus in addition to the negative breakdown of identity during crisis.

For adolescent females, often autistic, often struggling to make sense of their same-sex attraction, often struggling with identity exploration and the realities of male objectification, the sudden realization one is trans operates as a radical new lens through which to interpret all the confusing signals in your life that provides simple, black and white answers to the most profound questions of life. This clarity is cherished by an autistic mind overwhelmed by the ambiguities of life.

Once you realize that trans identity is answer to an identity crisis, and not an innate identity in and of itself that we are born with, it becomes easier to understand how modern transgenderism socially and psychologically functions as a replacement for religion in a secular age, where traditionally religion functioned as the resource from which one drew answers to these existential questions. Until we understand the spiritual dimensions of transgenderism, we will never be able to provide an adequate alternative, which, in my opinion, must be grounded in the love of God and submission to His Will and recognition that running away from your biological sex is a spiritual deadend.